The past month was a real test to my character! Had so much going on around me, over which I had no control! This is one truth that hit me hard right on my face! Till then I was thinking I was on top of the world, I always had a feeling, everything is under MY control! And last month taught me it isn’t so!
I was made to face completely new situations, situations which I haven’t experienced even once in my life so far! There were a lot of incidences which made me doubt my own abilities… And this is one thing that I haven’t been exposed to very often! I hate evaluating my capacities! I would say I’ve always been a go-getter!
There were days in last month when I felt if I should even get up from bed! (No, I’m not talking about my laziness again here! I mean, I was just reluctant to start my day!) I was actually scared to face my life! I was worried about what might go wrong once I set out on anything! I was worried what MORE might go wrong if I did anything!
And about 75% of what went wrong wasn’t under my control! I had no power over them! And this realization of life’s frailty came really bad on me! And last month saw me losing faith in life, losing faith in me… for the first time ever! I could see life wasn’t so cool, it had its share of shortcomings!
There were so many things that went really wrong last month! Don’t ask me what! Not just one thing! It was a month of realizations for me! Realization of bitter truth!
Hope I can face difficulties boldly in the future! I have never been a coward! But I’ve had problems in sorting out what went wrong last month!
But now, things have improved. And I’m happy to have found my groove again! I guess my life is cool and back!
